Friday, June 8, 2018

Words that rest on my heart.

I read two quotes recently that resonate deeply with me. Maybe you know what I mean - that moment when you have read something that bypasses the cerebrum and goes straight to your core. Words that elicit an unconscious "Mmmm" of recognition or a slight arrest of your breath. If you have words that do this for you, I would love to know what they are - what words make you hum.

On the surface, these quotes are pretty different. But to me, how they feel when I say them aloud and let them rest on my heart, it's like looking for the beginning and end of a circle.

"Be patient and tough. One day this pain will be useful to you." (Ovid) 

Patience, toughness. Two words. If I could hold these in my hands, they would be glass orbs. Round, smooth, hefty. Patience and toughness.

"How often things occur by mere chance which we dared not even hope for." (Terence) 

Hope is lighter, a shimmering net between each of us and our own personal long, dark well of sadness.

Ethereal Hope gives birth to her daughters, solid Patience and weighty Toughness.

These words that oppose on their face, but are relatives to each other underneath. They make me hum with a recognition flowing from deep inside.

I learned this year about a crafting group called Peaced Together for women who have experienced trauma, and someone told me recently about one of their activities. The women make a weaving. In addition to choosing pretty colored fabrics, they must pick a piece of cloth that is ugly in order to represent hardships in their lives, and weave it in with all the rest.

What would the color of your sorrow be?

I feel when I read certain words what those women must feel when they look at their weaving. This is what I feel: A sense of life as looked at from the highest, most comfortable cloud.

My body: Arms that embrace, toes that squeeze the earth, wings to fly. My soul: Patience and toughness, weights to ground me. Hope, to help me rise up.

From this vantage, I see both beautiful ugliness and ugly beauty. Pain and patience, toughness and hope. I see an infinitesimal glimpse of what God must see in all of us to love us so much.

The hardship intertwined with happiness. The joy with sorrow.

Not at peace. At peace.

All of it, woven in different colors, different cloth. All of it, the same tapestry.

No comments:

Post a Comment